Sunday E-Mail Funnies

A couple of funnies from my email this week.

The Arab and the Scotsman

An Arab Sheik was admitted to St Vincent Hospital for heart surgery, but prior to the surgery, the doctors needed to store his blood in case the need arose. As the gentleman had a rare type of blood, it couldn’t be found locally, so, the call went out to all the states.
Finally a Scot was located who had the same blood type. The Scot willingly donated his blood for the Arab. After the surgery, the Arab sent the Scotsman as appreciation for giving his blood, a new BMW, diamonds & US dollars.

A couple of days later, once again, the Arab had to go through a corrective surgery. His doctor telephoned the Scotsman who was more than happy to donate his blood again.

After the second surgery, the Arab sent the Scotsman a thank-you card & a jar of candies.

The Scotsman was shocked that the Arab this time did not reciprocate his kind gesture as he had anticipated. He phoned the Arab & asked him: “I thought you would be generous again, that you would give me a BMW, diamonds & money… But you only gave me a thank-you card & a jar of candies”.

To this the Arab replied: “Aye, but I now have Scottish blood in my veins

 

And the second contains an excellent strategy for men.

Hey USA – Vote For Canada in 2012

A buddy of mine posted this the other day. I found it hilarious, what do you think?

Vote Canada in 2012

Friday Funny – A 2fer

I found this one in m email today and chuckled a bit.  That is rare for me with email humour.  I equate most of it with spam.

A father buys a lie detector robot.  It detects a lie and slaps the liar.

He tests it out at dinner one night. The father asks his son what he did that day.

The son says, “I did some homework at Paul’s house.” The robot slaps the son.

The son says, “Ok, Ok. We were watching movies.”

Dad asks, “What movie did you watch?”

The son says, “Toy Story.” The robot slaps the son.

The son says, “Ok, Ok we were watching porn.”

Dad says, “What?!  At your age I didn’t even know what porn was!” The robot slaps the dad.

Mom laughs and says, “Well he certainly is your son!”   The robot slaps the mom .

Cover of "Toy Story: An Original Walt Dis...

The second one tonight is an oldie that I just watched again.  It slays me every time.

Have a great weekend.

Happy New Year To All My Friends

English: Photo of Team Singapore fireworks dis...

 

This is the 2011 fireworks display from London, UK.  Spectacular.  The Brits definitely did it right.  I really wish I was there watching this.  I would love to have posted the 2012 version, but am doing a scheduled post (Life has its own commitments), and really wanted to wish you all a Happy New Year.  I suggest hooking up your machine to the closest 80 inch TV and crank the volume.

 

My First Christmas Post – Mr Bean Christmas Scene

Mr. Bean

 

A week until Christmas and I haven’t done a post!!!  Unforgivable.  To make up for this oversight, please enjoy the attached video.  I mean what doesn’t go together like a Mr Bean skit and Christmas.

 

This May Be Cruel, But It Is Also Funny

Jimmy Kimmel put this one out there for parents.  A bit twisted, so if you don’t like this kind of humour, I would suggest that you not watch.  However, if you love this kind of laugh, you will be rolling on the floor.  What Jimmy did was ask parents to tell their kids they could open one present now, before Christmas.  The shtick is that it had to be a terrible present, film it and post it to YouTube under the heading YouTube Challenge – I Gave My Kids A Terrible Present.  The clip attached is from his show when he played a compilation of his favourites.  The last one is hilarious.

A Monday Giggle – No Children Were Harmed In The Making Of This Video

This cannot be described as anything other than terribly funny in a mega cute sort of way.

Labradors Are Very Smart Dogs

English: Choc lab in the flowers

 

I’m a sucker for dog videos.  This dog doesn’t need anyone’s help getting comfy at bedtime.

 

Music Video Made with Jelly Beans???

These are my Jelly Belly jelly beans, and you ...

This is a very cool video.  The work, the thought , the time that went into this is incredible.  Kina Grannis wanted to do something different and this, most definitely, is different.  The idea came from Greg Jardin, the director of the film.  The song “In Your Arms” is a nice piece, made extraordinary by this video.  The list below says it all.

To create a 3:25 video required:

22 months
1,357 hours
30 people
2 ladders
1 still camera
288,000 jelly beans

Enjoy, and appreciate the talent and work that created this.  The first insert is “THE VIDEO”.  The second describes the making of the film.  This is well worth the watch.

Saturday Morning Chuckle

I ran across this video this morning.  Cute.